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Tiny Tips for Moms and Dads #69 Home Schooling is not limited to Monday thru Friday- 8-3

Home schooling is a natural part of engaging as a family. Learning takes place in all aspects of what we do with and for our children.

Home school

I know that the privilege of being able to home school your child is not always feasible for some parents! But there are ways to intercede in your child’s learning experience and take charge of what you want your child to learn and be exposed to! There are gaps in our institutional educational system that we as families can fill in. School or learning is not confined to Monday thru Friday- 8-3! There are teachable moments that happen organically and there are opportunities for us as parents and grandparents as well as extended family and the village we create and sustain to support our children.

I have been blessed as a grandparent to participate in home schooling our grandchildren, and after 34 years of teaching children and teaching teachers in training to teach children, I get to have the honor of teaching our grandchildren to love the gift of learning! One of the most critical gaps in our educational system is not integrating the need for curriculum that is eclectic, focuses on the needs of individualized learning, and the role of social emotional develop that needs to be engrained in the overall curriculum. We have a world that is evolving in some unknown direction at warp speed! We have a responsibility to step in and slow down the life our children are being engulfed into!

They need time to discover who they are and what they are passionate about. And we need to be present for them so that as they engage with the world in and out of school, we are afforded the depth of observation that can take place in the home schooling environment! I don’t want to generalize and say that every home school program is perfection because each of us are doing it differently, but opportunities are there to invest daily in the education of their children.

Those parents that can’t or chose institutional programs must still keep these elements in the forefront of educating their children! I will confess the most difficult challenge I had as a parent was how and where to educate my Nikki! I listened to her and followed her direction. At 4 years old she told me she had to go to a school where they talked about God everyday. So she started out in the Lutheran schools and by 3rd grade she decided she wanted to go to Catholic school and did so thru her college education! It was a fit for her! You have to find the fit for your child!

P.S. I don’t know how she found out about Catholic school because we were not Catholic! But it was sooo Niki!

Ua is an influence in his sister Aoluna’s life everyday and he takes being part of her world seriously

The beauty of learning is that it is limitless and shared with this we love!

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TINY TIPS 4 MOMS AND DADS

Tiny Tips for Moms and Dads #67. Protecting Our Children’s Divine Identity!

We as parents have a responsibility to safeguard our children from losing the authentic, divine identity which is endowed with everything and their essence they need in life.

As parents we work so hard to tune into the essence of who our child is.  We want to know how they feel and how they respond to the experiences that they encounter in their childhood.  It takes careful observation, genuine engagement, and loving and supportive communication.  We have to access these traits of who our child is so that we can guide them, protect them, and nurture their “true identity”.  This is not an identity we design or construct for them.  It does not always fit in the societal norms, but after all, we model and teach our children, that although they are in the world, they are not of this world.  Their spirit is their shield that stands before the world and any challenge or situation they might encounter.  We fortify in them with the concept they are in themselves “enough”, “perfection”, and are meant to live a “purpose driven life” that they alone have command of. 

They must be taught that they have an inner voice which is their conscious that resides within them to guide their gift of “discernment”.  They must be taught that no one has the power to dictate who they are or to try to dress them in an identity that is not who they know themselves to be.  They are not a character in someone else story or a generalization from someone else’s life experience.  They are who they are, and they were created and designed in and with “pure love”.  We teach them that they are love and that they are loved-unconditionally and eternally by us their parents and their village.  They do not need other people’s validation or acceptance because they answer only to “Great Spirit”.  WE teach them about the fabric of what real love feels like and looks like so that they have a foundational base on which to love and be loved. 

I cannot begin to tell other parents how magical and unbelievable it is to be given the gift of parenthood, because it is different for every parent and might be in alignment with their own childhood experiences.  The grace in this is that each of us can chose to be by working on ourselves, the parent our child needs to be “Whole”, “Healthy”, and “Happy”.  It can be overwhelming to step out on faith and evaluate who we are being as a parent, but oh, what an amazing experience it can be once we figure out “who we are in our own divine identity”.

 I so invite you as parents and or perspective parents to read and engage in my book-

“Embracing the Gift of Parenthood-How to create a loving relationship with your child”. 

This gift of parenting is a lifetime commitment, and the journey can be life changing.

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Spiritual Observations of Gratitude

Sunday Morning Prayers-#38. Peace Must Abide in Each of Us If there is to Peace on Earth!

The earth deserves more from us!
Like the creation of humanity, it was gifted to us to
provide us with all the resources to sustain our lives. 
It thrives in peace and implodes when abused and taken advantage of.

Dear “Great Spirit”,

How do we begin to ask for grace and mercy for losing our way and our promise to live life in our “divine identity”?  We have forgotten about the beauty and intelligence that you gifted us with to love one another and to be guardians of this magnificent planet!  Welding up in so many of us is the urgency to find peace and share that “peace that surpassed all understanding” with one another.  The peace that so many of us a desire to live our lives with and through. 

We need that sense of peace to navigate all the uncertainties that life can present us with.  We need that peace to protect our minds, bodies and spirits from disease and pain.  We need that peace to parent our children so that they too can live a healthy and rewarding life.  We need that peace to vibrate across this planet so that people come to a realization, that they are “their brothers and sisters’ keepers”!  We need that peace to “call in righteousness and justice to dissuade people from the temptation of warring against each other.  We need that peace so that our creative gifts can flourish and enhance the beauty and integrity of what it is to be human. We need that peace to awaken within each being their authentic soul’s expression that will bring us back to thee ‘Great Spirit”.  We need your peace “Great Spirit” that peace that is innate to having a relationship with you.  You are the Alpha and the Omega of our existence, and without the tenderness and purity of that relationship, we will never experience that “peace” -that missing piece-we are seeking!

Ashe!  Ashe!  Ashe!  Amen!

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TINY TIPS 4 MOMS AND DADS

Tiny Tips for Moms and Dads #66. What Do We Say to Our Children About This Warring World?

Our Children are our most precious gifts, and sometimes we feel helpless in protecting them from the chaos and violence of this world.

I know as a parent how I have over the years carried on my heart a feeling of concern and even sometimes fear, that I might not be able to protect my child from things that can be harmful to her in the world of so many unknowns.  It seems the expectations of what is age appropriate for children is either out of whack or non-existent all together.  We have to search our hearts and intuition to figure out what we need to do and provide our children with to support them in navigating the world safely and successfully.  We all have a responsibility of safeguarding the children in this world.  It is something that should resonate with our species naturally but unfortunately, it does not so we have to find ways to “call people” into action to prioritize children and their welfare on a global level.  Each of us must find a way to contribute to this “CALL”!

This is a little song I wrote with the support of my family that says what I am holding in my heart for children:

Have A Heart 4 Kids Today

Have a heart 4 kids today, have a heart so they don’t go astray!

Have a heart 4 kids today, for without them we would lose our way.

Have a heart, have a heart, have a heart, have a heart!

Have a heart, have a heart, for Kids today!

We must stand and lend a helping hand, united we must stand,

Protect and guide them every day, but never ever standing in their way.

Have a heart, have a heart, have a heart, have a heart!

Have a heart, have a heart, for Kids today!

No more hunger no more thirst, no more war that leaves a curse.

No child left holding pain- only our love will they gain.

Have a heart, have a heart, have a heart, have a heart!

Have a heart, have a heart, for Kids today!

They have come to help us understand, Live in love and peace throughout the land.

They know there is a master plan, and that everything is in His hands.

Have a heart, have a heart, have a heart, have a heart!

Have a heart, have a heart, for Kids today!

All our children born in love’s pure light; they have come to help us share their sight.

If we listen to their little voice, we will come to the creator’s source.

Have a heart, have a heart, have a heart, have a heart!

Have a heart, have a heart, for Kids today!

No more hunger no more thirst, no more war that leaves a curse.

No child left holding pain, only our love will they gain.

Have a heart, have a heart, have a heart, have a heart!

 Have a heart, have a heart, for Kids today!

Let each of us Stand UP! Speak UP! Show Up!

For Our Children!

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TINY TIPS 4 MOMS AND DADS

Tiny Tips for Moms and Dads #65 What are the Important Character Traits that We Want to Support Our Children Developing in their “Divine Identity”?

There are so many teaching moments if we are in the
present and engaged with our children.

I wrote a blog this week entitled “Whose Footsteps are Worthy of You Following on Your

Divine Life’s Journey?  It was a reflection on the principles that I strive to demonstrate or execute in my life. As for me I have found that the principles that Christ called us to emulate resonate with me.  These simple elements in His character are what I strive to demonstrate in my own life, and they are the principles by which I raised my child, engage with my family, friends, or strangers I encounter on my path.  I demonstrated these elements in my “purpose” career when I taught teachers to teach children and when I work in advocacy for children and parents.  The principles are simple and straight forward. 

So many times, I have people who ask me to address the current condition of how our children are interacting in the world with negative behavior that sometimes evolves into violent acts of crime and destruction.  They ask me why the children now seem to have no respect for anyone or anything.  I am giving that concern some real inner conversation and deliberation.  I see what they are referring to and I know where some of the anger and pain is coming from.  I hear my mother saying to me since childhood, “Start out the way you want to end up”!

 We as parents and caregivers lay the foundation for how our children will respond to the world and ultimately how the world will respond to them if they don’t have the social emotional development and the social graces to navigate this unforgiving world.  It is true when it is said that with children-“all eyes are on us” their parents and caregivers.  They have so many expectations for who we are to them, the family they represent, their community, and most importantly to who they are authentically to and for ourselves.  They pick up on all the nuisances of who we are and what our human limitations are.  As children, they don’t get the full picture, but they do begin to imitate what they see us do and what they hear us say.  Actually, at times it can be like looking on a mirror and that can be frightening but the reveal can be our saving grace. Every parent has to decide what character “tools” they want their child to have to honor and respect themselves and others on their “divine journey”.  These are the elements that I have tried to demonstrate that resonate with my soul expression:

  1. Compassionate
  2. In service to humanity-Selflessness
  3. Loving Unconditionally
  4. Forgiving
  5. Gentleness
  6. Patience
  7. Humble
  8. Agent of Peace
  9. Honest and Trustworthy
  10. Dependable
  11. Grateful
  12. Generous
  13. Thoughtfulness
  14. Reverence
  15. Discernment- Wisdom

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Spiritual Observations of Gratitude TINY TIPS 4 MOMS AND DADS

Tiny Tips for Moms and Dads #64 Separation and Divorce Can Be Traumatic for Children, But It Does Not Have to Devastate Their Well-Being If We as Parents Communicate and Have a Tangible, Congenial, Egoless, and Cooperative Plan of Action!

It is a long road to healing a family that has or is experiencing the loss of an intact family unit, but healing the parental relationship will ultimately heal the fears and grief that their children will have to navigate through.  It is not easy, but more than worthwhile and definitely critical for the social-emotional well-being of our children.

I cannot begin to share the experiences I have had as an educator dealing with the trauma and grief of children whose families have disbanded their relationship as an intact functioning unit.  I have with years of dealing with these situations realized that the healing for these children lies in the healing of the parent’s relationship.   Children need the security that their parents can in spite of them not being in a love relationship with each other, does not mean that they are not in a loving relationship with their children as their parents.  It takes a lot of maturity and what some people might see as sacrifice, to put the welfare of their children as their priority.  There are of course situations where the adults can be in an abusive and violent relationship and that takes a different kind of resolution to come to terms with that first of all their children must be safe.  In the world we live in and recognizing the fragility of the human spirit, people are having difficulty sometimes making decisions that are void of being hurtful and dangerous.  The most unfortunate part of dealing with people that have abandoned their ability to use their gift of discernment, is that so often they respond to situations and people from their irrational pain bodies. 

Taking content from my most recent book, “The Global Covenant to Protect the Sacred Lives of Children”, and I quote-

“There really is a lot of maturity and selflessness required to raising and caring for children.  Whether a parent, teacher, social worker, physician, coach, or youth worker, those of us that have decided to raise children, serve children or interact with children and youth in some respect, must understand that means we have to come to the realization, that there is sacrifice and a huge commitment involved. “

“There are characteristics that those of us that are responsible for the care, guidance, and nurturing children must have in our development.  If we attend to children lovingly and compassionately, we will teach them the beauty of love and what authentic love is and can represent in their own lives. We have an opportunity to show them how they deserve to be loved unconditionally and how expansive and rich in texture their ability to love can be.”

I know that parents want the best for their children so I know that we must be intentional about working on their behalf to do whatever we must to secure their happiness, wholeness, and feelings of being loved, honored and respected. I invite all parents and those planning to become parents to read my book-

“Embracing the Gift of Parenthood- How to Create a Loving Relationship with your Children”.  We as parents have been gifted life’s most precious treasure- a child!  To quote from this book-

“The picture of the massive scope of the life of each of us is what makes the totality of this universe the experience that it is.  Each of us plays a vital and necessary part and no one’s life is a mistake.  We have such a great opportunity to develop children that will evolve into their destiny of greatness.  We must step into our purpose as parents.  It is a timeless, demanding, creative, spontaneous, flexible, and exhausting job.  The gratitude for what we are called to do as parents comes not necessarily from our children, but more importantly, from the sense of satisfaction in being able to say, “Well done thy good and faithful servant.”   We are each called to be “servants in the service of man.” The man we serve is not only our own children, but also all the children in the world for whom we are ultimately responsible for.  The world we create with our lives directly or indirectly affects the world we create for the children of today and tomorrow.  We must wake up and get busy!”

We have been blessed!

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Spiritual Observations of Gratitude

Sunday Morning Prayers-#33 Our Dreams and Wishes are Embedded in Our “Wailua”- “Personal Spirit” that We Were Created with from the Heavenly Realm.

The joy that radiates from Celio’s “Spirit” reflects the essence of his soul expression. He is endowed with the dreams and wishes for his life that “Great Spirit” has gifted him with.

Dear “Great Spirit”,

We are so blessed to have children in our midst, to remind us of what each of us possess from the time of our birth- “dreams and wishes for our life gifted by thee”. You know what we need to manifest in our life to complete the desires of your heart for our lives. We know that each of us have been created with our own personal spirit-“Wailua”, that holds these dreams and aspirations for the beauty and fulfillment of our life’s purpose. Our “Wailua” is the protector and nurture of these dreams and precious wishes. Children are so uninhibited and authentic in expressing these treasures than we are as adults. “Great Spirit”, today I ask you to ignite in us again not only the recognition that we possess these dreams and wishes for our life, but to stir up our “Wailua” so that we are energized to manifest them into reality.

We understand that we must cultivate an environment where we take the time and energy to act on our dreams and wishes because these elements of our being play a vital part in our “divine identity” and our relationship with thee.  We continue to need your support and guidance in fulfilling our divine purpose and these gifts must come to fruition.  Surround us with people in our life that will encourage us and support us.  Help us to see these dreams in our children so that we can be of not only support to them but to safeguard their dreams and wishes from being tapered with or nullified by a world that is either jealous or indifferent to who they are as children and what they possess to enrich and enhance humanity.  Thank you, “Great Spirit”, for all you do for us and for all you have endowed us with.  We are blessed!  Ashe!  Ashe! Amen!

PS

This post was divined by our family movie night when we watched the Disney movie “Wish”.  It hit me so hard how important the desires of our heart and soul are and from whence they come. Our dreams, wishes, and aspirations for our life are our divine birthright!

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TINY TIPS 4 MOMS AND DADS

Tiny Tips for Moms and Dads #62          Our Child’s Personal Spirit- Wailua

Our children are so unique and special.  We must be aware that their spirit speaks for them and that we must honor and respect the expression of that “personal spirit”- “Wailua”!

As parents in this complex world we don’t ever seem to have enough time with our children in a uninterrupted, unstructured, spontaneous, family time.  It seems like we have to be so intentional about being together as a family and engaging with each other.  We don’t seem to have the time to really study our children and dig deep into observing their nature so that we catch the fullness of their “Wailua”. 

It is so important for us to be in tune with the “who their spirit is” so that we can parent from a “soul to soul” connection.  Each of us have our own “personal spirit-Wailua” and it holds our sacred divine identity.  It must be recognized, protected, guided, and respected.  Our children need for us, as the most important people in their life, to relate to them for who they are in their authentic identity.  We as parents and caregivers must be sensitive and responsive to the “Wailuas” of our children and their soul expression.  In doing so we are teaching to them to honor and respect their “Wailua” as well.   We are so blessed to have these little “Wailuas” grace us with their presence!

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TINY TIPS 4 MOMS AND DADS

Tiny Tips for Moms and Dads #61 The Village is a Child’s Grounding Cord!

Children are entitled to a “village-community” that supports and guides them through their childhood and hopefully, will be an integral part of mentoring their adulthood. 
We need the voices of our elder’s wisdom to keep us grounded in loving and respecting ourselves.

Parents have an unspoken responsibility to formulate a “village-community” to interface and engage in the life of their children.  In some religious and cultural practices, parents choose what is known as “Godparents” for their children.  In some cultures, family and extended family are brought together in a traditional ritual routine to be an active part of a child’s life.  Family gatherings, and special occasions in that child’s life are shared with the family.  The child looks for those people to participate in their life.  In some cultures, the grandparents are held in high esteem and what they think and say are considered vital to the child’s development.  If there are aunts, uncles, and cousins that are active in a child’s life, these can develop into important loving relationships.

 I can remember how important my Nana Marie- my grandmother, was in my life.  I had my favorite grand aunts and grand uncles, aunts, and uncles, and most definitely favorite cousins that I am still connected to and participate in my life.  My parents designed the context and structure of these relationships for our family.  Sometimes people do not have access or the logistics to be in close relationship with family and then are called to find other people they honor and trust to be members of the “village-community” that supports the life and welfare of their children.  What is most important is for a child to have a strong and vital support system that is in alignment with the values, ethics, and moral standards of the family. Continuity and consistency is critical in the raising our children. 

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TINY TIPS 4 MOMS AND DADS

Tiny Tips for Moms and Dads #56 There’s No Need to Yell-“We Parent from the Heart”!

Lei has such a beautiful way of communicating with her children.
It is open and receptive! It is engulfed in unconditional love!
And founded on a lot of patience!

It is such a wonderful challenge to try to figure out how to communicate with our children.  So much is involved and so much is at stake in formulating how we develop our communication relationship.  It is the foundation of how we will talk to and with our children into adulthood.  The basics of our modality of communicating must have strategies that evolve as our children grow and develop.  We always want to be truthful with them in words that are age appropriate and are in alignment with their personality and character. We have to feel the nature of our children and what they respond to and how they respond to different situations.  Every day is a day of learning who they are and even equally important, in the process we learn things about ourselves. 

Communication is a two-way operation. So much can be lost if we are not tuned into all the clues that are part of the communication designed. As we engage with our children through all their daily experiences if we are “present” in their lives, we will pick up those clues and learn how to translate them into what we are trying to express to them.  We are teaching them how to communicate not with just us and our family, but we are laying the groundwork for how they will navigate communicating in the world.  It takes a lot of practice, mistakes, misunderstanding, trial and error, but if we are conscientious, we will succeed.  Always remember that communication is not a perfect science.  There will be times that we come to a point where we get stuck in our ability to communicate with one another, but that is part of the human design. Remember to always:

Take a deep breath-

Speak in your normal natural voice- no yelling- that shuts communication down!

Listen attentively!

Reiterate what you think you heard!

Make sure you follow up with checking in with your child’s feelings behind the words!

Never open a conversation when you are in a state of anger.

Remember, you are the adult in the relationship, so you have the responsibility of taking the lead, keeping channels open and receptive, keep a balance in who speaks and always keep communication civil and respectful.

“Save the Yell for a “Safety Issue”- when your child is in a dangerous situation!”

P.S. Like when my child Niki at age two tried to investigate the mouth of a Doberman Pitcher and pried his mouth open to look inside!!!!