Author: heart4kidsadvocacyforum

I am an advocator for children and families with an intention of rising up to enlighten the world of the value and urgency there is to make our children a global priority. We are their past, their present and their future. We must Stand up! Speak up! Show up on their behalf. Join us through our website: heart4kidsadvocacy.org

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Blogs in Diverse Languages Caring for self Consciousness Living In The Presence Meditations for the Soul Peace and joyful practices for life Practices and Rituals To Live Your Divined Purpose spirituality Sustaining our Humanity

#6 -A Thought 4 Monday To Carry You Through This Beautiful Day!  Easy Does It!

#6 -A Thought 4 Monday To Carry You Through This Beautiful Day!  Easy Does It!

 Each Day In Your Life is Unique!

 ***For translation: touch the Blue Globe on the top right-hand corner

Monday is our day of reflection where we look back gently, notice patterns, and gain quiet insight in the midst of all that is transpiring throughout our busy day.  It is a day to observe without judgment.  Monday invites softness towards ourselves, to others and toward what didn’t go perfectly.  Our mantra to see us through this day is that we are to “Begin the week with kindness, gentility, and compassion, not criticism and blame.  We move through the day with ease and grace, and take our interactions with other people and situations with a knowingness that we are all at the moment, “doing our best”. 

We have to be mindful that we are not “walking in the same reality as another person”, and that to be human is to not be perfection but a “Work” in progress.    We are on this path to learn and absorb the lessons that elevate and evolve our soul’s expression.  Each of us have chosen in our co-created life’s architectural design, what lessons we need to experience that will bring us closer and closer to our divined “Soul Identity and Purpose”.  Every opportunity we have, like what Monday affords us, to reflect and digest our patterns and choices, gives us more insight not into just ourselves, but in how to operate and navigate life in a more gentle and constructive approach.

 Oh, what a gift it is to not have to be in a state of agitation, frustration, anger, and disappointment, because you have made a conscious decision to respond to life from a healthier more gentile perspective.  We give grace to ourselves and grace to others and the world vibrates on a higher more sacred level.  This is how transformation takes place and this is how our humanity can sustain itself.  One gentle being and one gentle action at a time.  It is contagious you know.

So, breathe deeply! Close your eyes and visualize something that brings you back into homeostasis with your soul expression.  May today bring you a sense of peace, joy, and moments of feeling loved and validated for who you are and what you are gifting humanity.

Ashé! Have a Blessed Day!

**Note: These recordings are based on my blog writings, and all of this comes through Spirit.  The recordings are a reflection of the writings and are not edited because I do not want to alter what is coming to me through “Great Spirit”.  I am not seeking perfection, only serving as a vessel to bring love, peace, and joy, to our humanity.

Thank You Jim Brickman for your beautiful music that vibrates through this recording. This is a selection from his album – “Music to Quiet Your Mind and Sooth Your World”.

Stay in Touch:          http://heart4kidsadvocacy.org/

 

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A Communal Transformative Hub-Tiny Tips For Moms and Dads Early Childhood Education educators Embracing the Gift of Parenthood Parenting Tips

Tiny Tips 4 Moms and Dads #6-Parents Have to Make Time for “Time In”!

Tiny Tips for Moms and Dads # 6 – Parents Have to Make Time for “Time In”!

We need to support our children in expressing what they need from us.  It is important to give each child a “Sacred-Time In” with us!

***For translation: touch the Blue Globe on the top right hand corner

What does it mean this “Sacred -Time In”?  We all hear the about the punitive “Time Out”, that we as Early Childhood educators and children advocates deem- inappropriate!  In contrast to that “Time In”, refers to having an alone time, a special time, a mommy and me or daddy and me time.  It is the time that holds the opportunity for re-connection between parent and child.  It is the time for taking walks, going to the park to play, having meals together, reading stories, playing games, answering questions that have been on their mind, being completely and utterly available and attentive to “Just them”! It is about setting aside intentionally, time and space for them.  It is not getting on the phone or any other device that would distract you from being totally “present”.

I think perhaps that we feel that we are spending time with our children just by being in the same place at the same time.    The reality is, just because we are “With them”, it does not mean we are “Into Them”.  I observe my niece with her children, and she has made it clear with her children that if they need to have a “Special Day” or “Special Time” with her, all they need to do is to express their needs.  Together, she and her child or children have learned to ask for what they need.  In turn she and the child pick a day, make a list of the “To Do Things”, and seal it with a kiss. Snuggling is always part of the day’s agenda!  Lots of hugs and kisses!

 

Now of course there has to be a plan, not that it is written in stone!  But start out contemplating what you have the time and energy for before you even begin to enter into this contract because children are relentless!  When you make a promise be ready to keep it!  I would strongly suggest the following steps to this adventure into the “Sacred Time In” proposal:

  1. Figure out what you have the time and energy to invest in.
  2. Pick the date and time.
  3. Make sure you have taken care of yourself first so that you are really up to the adventure!
  4. With your child, or children, plan out the activities and evaluate what is and is not feasible in your “Sacred Time In”! Don’t overstretch yourself!! Sometimes it is better to take on one or two things to do and spread it out over a day or perhaps 2 days.  If you do too much you run the risk of things falling apart!
  5. Stay attentive and sensitive to your child’s energy as well. Sometimes they have big ideas but because they are children, just like you they get tired.  Look for the signals and if necessary, change plans that include postponing things, choosing other less strenuous activities, or just implement “snuggle time”-reading/ watching a show together/playing a game together.
  6. It is really ok to also admit that you are tired and need to call your won “Time In” to catch your breath and recharge. It works both ways, but you have to start out the way you want to end up.
  7. At the end of the “Sacred Time In”, set up a time when you can have a re-cap chat and talk about: What you both liked/What you did not like/What you would like to do again and even differently.
  8. Remember to take pictures so you have memories and for older children they could have a journal to write their memories in with pictures.

Trust me when I say these “Sacred Time In” events, will add so much to your relationship with your child!  Every child wants to feel they are special to their mommie and daddy!

It’s quite the balancing act, but somehow Lei pulls it off!

And now Aoluna is in the mix too.

One day at a time!!

Stay in Touch: http://heart4kidsadvocacy.org/ 

 

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#5 -A Thought 4 Sunday To Carry You Through This Beautiful Day!  Not Just Any Day- Your Sabbath is Sacred!

#5 -A Thought 4 Sunday To Carry You Through This Beautiful Day!  Not Just Any Day- Your Sabbath is Sacred!

Each Day In Your Life is Unique!

***For translation: touch the Blue Globe on the top right-hand corner

 

Sunday is the day where we can reconnect with “Spirit”, family, community, and self.  This has to be my favorite day of the week!  It is hard navigating all of the agenda that takes up the week and at the same time carve out space with “Spirit”, Family, Community, and time for Self-care, into the fabric of our lives.  Safeguarding our Sabbath has got to be an intentional ritual that we do not allow anyone or anything to infringe upon. 

It is a day that can afford us a rekindling with the people that we hold dear to us.  It is a day when we hold an intention that the relationships we have with our family is a critical core element of who we are and why we as a “spiritual tribe” formed this eternal relationship and have traveled endless lifetimes together.  It is an amazing gift.  Sunday can be a time we reconnect to the family from which we come to get recharged so that our spiritual energetic force field is ready to navigate and move forward in our life with a vitality and joy.  This is what supports our divined identity and divined purpose.  We cannot “Do” life or be “A life”, if we lose sight of what energizes our “Soul”! 

It is not really complicated or out of reach.  We just have to make time and space for being present with one another.  We have to be intentional about connecting with one another either physically, which is the best way, or with the technology we have access to now, a facetime conversation, a text, an ecard, or if possible- a pop call passing by just to give a hug and say something that brings that loved one a smile. 

 My faith community had always been a central part of my life, and I think it holds for me a sacred and safe place to come into commune with people of like faith beliefs and values.  It can revitalize your spirit and give you an electric charge validating that you supported in your belief system.  It’s kind of nice to know that there are others coming from the same understanding that you come from.  That can in itself be empowering. 

 And last but not least, is our time to reconnect in greater depth, our intimate connection with “Great Spirit”, “The One Source”, “God”, “Our Creator”.   It seems that I am always cognizant of being in connection with the “Presence”.  It is just a companionship that is as close as every breath I take and every beat of my heart. I never feel any kind of separation or disconnect, but when I am wholly intentional about engaging with “Great Spirit”, it is an entirely different experience. 

 The shower of love and wholeness that covers every aspect of my being cannot be described.  It takes me completely out of myself, and the love is so overwhelming that it takes my breath away.  WE all need to treat ourselves to that moment of love, peace, joy, and wholeness that only that relationship can extend to us.  There are no contracts, no invoices, no obligation for receiving it other than to know that it is always available even without asking for it.

So, breathe deeply! Close your eyes and visualize something that brings you back into homeostasis with your soul expression.  May today bring you a sense of peace, joy, and moments of feeling loved and validated for who you are and what you are gifting humanity.

Ashé! Have a Blessed Day!

**Note: These recordings are based on my blog writings, and all of this comes through Spirit.  The recordings are a reflection of the writings and are not edited because I do not want to alter what is coming to me through “Great Spirit”.  I am not seeking perfection, only serving as a vessel to bring love, peace, and joy, to our humanity.

 Thank You Jim Brickman for your beautiful music that vibrates through this recording. This is a selection from his album – “Music to Quiet Your Mind and Sooth Your World”.

Stay in Touch:     http://heart4kidsadvocacy.org/

 

 

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#5 -A Thought 4 Saturday To Carry You Through This Beautiful Day!  -No More Imposed Expectations!

#5 -A Thought 4 Saturday To Carry You Through This Beautiful Day!  No More Imposed Expectations!

Each Day In Your Life is Unique!

***For translation: touch the Blue Globe on the top right-hand corner

Saturday asks us to release expectations we place on others. Now having allowed ourselves to no longer be burdened with that old habit of imposing unnecessary expectations on our daily lives, we are in a position to have that same grace for others.  Sometimes we hold other people accountable for things they might not have the capacity to do or really are even interested in doing.  We fall into a habit of assumptions and don’t take into consideration that we do not have the authority on a spiritual level to dictate what another person’s divined identity or divined purpose has as it’s own agenda for their life experiences.  Sometimes we get so stuck in the “What we need or what the situation might need”, that we mentally assign others to try to fit them into fill the gap. 

I think it is important to leave space for people to show up, but to impose on them with an already preconceived agenda for them is not respectful or appropriate.  This does not stop us from asking for help, but when you don’t attach expectations as what their response should be- yep- we have freed ourselves.  You know it’s that “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you” kind of philosophy.  What we have to realize is that when we “let someone else” off the hook from being burdened and strapped with other people’s expectations we are freeing ourselves of additional responsibility that we really don’t need to take on!  What a gift we are gifting ourselves as each day as we evolve spiritually- becoming more and more of ourselves- light-joy- peace and love.

So, breathe deeply! Close your eyes and visualize something that brings you back into homeostasis with your soul expression.  May today bring you a sense of peace, joy, and moments of feeling loved and validated for who you are and what you are gifting humanity.

Ashé! Have a Blessed Day!

**Note: These recordings are based on my blog writings, and all of this comes through Spirit.  The recordings are a reflection of the writings and are not edited because I do not want to alter what is coming to me through “Great Spirit”.  I am not seeking perfection, only serving as a vessel to bring love, peace, and joy, to our humanity.

 Thank You Jim Brickman for your beautiful music that vibrates through this recording. This is a selection from his album – “Music to Quiet Your Mind and Sooth Your World”.

Stay in Touch:     http://heart4kidsadvocacy.org/

 

 

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#5 -A Thought 4 Friday To Carry You Through This Beautiful Day! “Beauty and Grace”

#5 -A Thought 4 Friday To Carry You Through This Beautiful Day!  “Beauty and Grace”!

Each Day In Your Life is Unique!

***For translation: Touch the Blue Globe on the top right hand corner

Friday calls us to be convicted in our belief that beauty and grace heals what effort exhausts.  I can relate to this on so many levels.  Yesterday when blogging about gratitude and taking time to name my blessings one by one, the list seemed to never end.  Sometimes when I stand outside on my balcony and gaze at the sky, I am overwhelmed at the beauty that is in my eyes view.  I cannot even put into words how the feeling that the grace I have been given in my life experiences in conjunction with the beauty that surrounds me not just in nature, but in the spiritual beauty of the people that are the grounding cords of love and support in my life mean to me.

 It is the beauty that fills my daughter’s soul expressions of caring for me in gentle thoughtful ways.  It is the love between mother and child that no other bond can compare to.  It is the steadfast love and gestures of attention and devotion that my siblings bring to my life that I know intuitively are eternal relationships. It is the love expressions of my nieces that are always ready to pitch in to help me whenever they can lend their gifts to support my work and their concern that I am ok.  It is the love and laughter of my grand nephews and niece – who I consider to be more like my grandchildren because we are so intimately connected to one another, that keep me young not just at heart, but physically to keep up with the demands of all the things they insist I do.  It is the love and admiration that my closest of cousins and friends have given me that throughout my life that has supported my “Work”.

When you can see the beauty and grace in a person’s soul, you have encountered a healing agent that is making a difference in the world.  We are so blessed to have inherited this planet, but we are even more blessed when we acknowledge the beauty within each of us and find ways to honor and respect how that beauty and grace affects our lives.  We need to be intentional about recognizing that essence in each other, because sometimes that presents an opening for that person to shine their light and grace the world with the beauty of their soul.  We are all destained in our original design to be healing agents of love and grace, we just need to step into the wholeness of who we are.  Oh, how this world needs us to shine our beauty and share our grace.

So, breathe deeply! Close your eyes and visualize something that brings you back into homeostasis with your soul expression.  May today bring you a sense of peace, joy, and moments of feeling loved and validated for who you are and what you are gifting humanity.

Ashé! Have a Blessed Day!

**Note: These recordings are based on my blog writings, and all of this comes through Spirit.  The recordings are a reflection of the writings and are not edited because I do not want to alter what is coming to me through “Great Spirit”.  I am not seeking perfection, only serving as a vessel to bring love, peace, and joy, to our humanity.

Thank You Jim Brickman for your beautiful music that vibrates through this recording. This is a selection from his album – “Music to Quiet Your Mind and Sooth Your World”.

Stay in Touch:     http://heart4kidsadvocacy.org/

 

 

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#5 -A Thought 4 Thursday To Carry You Through This Beautiful Day! “Gratitude”

#5 -A Thought 4 Thursday To Carry You Through This Beautiful Day!  Gratitude!

Each Day In Your Life is Unique!

Thursday is a day in which we can take stock of the elements in our life that we are grateful for.  We actually do take a lot of things for granted.  Little things in our life that seem so natural for us to have that we are not conscious that so many other people have a different life experience that finds them in poverty, homeless, addicted to things that have destroyed the quality and vibrance of their lives.  We go about our day not empathetically conscious that there are children all over this planet without families to care for them, food and clothing to protect their bodies and sustain their health.  How often do we say to ourselves I am so grateful that I don’t have to listen to bombs blasting all around me fearing for my life. 

I had a dear friend from Iran who that suffered from PTSD.  We became friends as new teachers in a preschool class and co-taught.  She was one of the gentlest most loving teachers I ever had the honor of teaching with. The closer our friendship grew, the more she revealed to me the things she had experienced in her own childhood.  She was always on guard and hypersensitive about the children we were left to care for.  I can’t imagine why in this day and age, children are still experiencing these travesties.  We have in this country so much to be grateful for, even as we are being held hostage by a heartless regime. 

I am not happy about the state of our country and what is being perpetrated here and across this planet that is causing crimes against humanity, but at the same time I have to pause and be grateful that I have the consciousness and the soul to recognize how blessed I am.  I don’t want to take anything for granted.  I feel that by living in a state of gratitude it has allowed me the strength to speak out on behalf of those who are not living the life they deserve because of the conditions of a broken humanity.  I know this is a little heavy, but I have to write and speak what my soul wants to express. 

Today, Thursday, is calling for us to put our gratitude into action.  There is something each of us can do today in the fabric of this day to bring to light what we are grateful for and what we want to make our humanity healed and viable.  We need to highlight that there is still more beauty, still more possibilities of loving and being loved, still more abundance for all if we but care and share, still more avenues and resources available to fill in the voids and heal the ills that our world is facing.  We are not powerless!  We are not fragile and impotent!  We are not ignorant- we see what we see-we hear what we hear- and we know truth from lies- and evil from good!

 Count your blessings and take the time to name them one by one.  Show the world what gratitude looks like-feels like – and what living in gratitude reaps not for just yourself but for others.  The power of gratitude can move mountains and quiet the angry seas of greed and misuse of fraudulent powers.  Each of us have been ordained to be “The Truth and the Light” of the power of Love. Don’t waste it embrace it!

So, breathe deeply! Close your eyes and visualize something that brings you back into homeostasis with your soul expression.  May today bring you a sense of peace, joy, and moments of feeling loved and validated for who you are and what you are gifting humanity.

Ashé! Have a Blessed Day!

**Note: These recordings are based on my blog writings, and all of this comes through Spirit.  The recordings are a reflection of the writings and are not edited because I do not want to alter what is coming to me through “Great Spirit”.  I am not seeking perfection, only serving as a vessel to bring love, peace, and joy, to our humanity.

***For translation: touch the Blue Globe on the top right-hand corner

Thank You Jim Brickman for your beautiful music that vibrates through this recording. This is a selection from his album – “Music to Quiet Your Mind and Sooth Your World”.

Stay in Touch:     http://heart4kidsadvocacy.org/

It is not their job, it is ours! 

 

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#5 -A Thought 4 Wednesday To Carry You Through This Beautiful Day! Check In Day!

#5 -A Thought 4 Wednesday To Carry You Through This Beautiful Day!  Check In Day!

Each Day In Your Life is Unique!

Wednesday, which is the middle of the week, is a perfect day for checking in with ourselves.  Wednesday provides the space for us to see the meaning in our thinking and feelings as we move through the day.  This is a real opening for us when you think about it!  Having the insight to be in touch with what we are feeling in the moment instead of holding back and not being aware of what we are truthfully thinking or feeling is healthier for us.  It actually has to become a way of operating.  It has to become a habit in order to feel natural and comfortable for us. 

We do the things we do and we think the things we think not randomly but for a reason.  Our thoughts and feelings reflect how we are impacted by what we experience and how we chose to respond consciously or how we respond unconsciously.  If we actually take time at the moment or reflect later and access the reasoning behind our responses we will learn so much about ourselves.  I can’t begin to imagine how many thoughts pass through our minds in a day or how many times in day feelings pop up. I know it can be a lot to navigate.

 I know that it is impossible to dissect everything that passes through us, but it is important that we don’t ignore thoughts or feelings that make us uncomfortable or out of sync with our spirit.  And I might add that it is important to acknowledge the thoughts and feelings that give us joy and a sense of peace and contentment. Just be cognizant and check in with yourself periodically or when you feel something is pulling you out of yourself.  We have the power to steer our emotions and thoughts in a positive and productive direction that makes us feel whole, healthy, and happy. 

 So, breathe deeply! Close your eyes and visualize something that brings you back into homeostasis with your soul expression.  May today bring you a sense of peace, joy, and moments of feeling loved and validated for who you are and what you are gifting humanity.

Ashé! Have a Blessed Day!

Note: These recordings are based on my blog writings, and all of this comes through Spirit.  The recordings are a reflection of the writings and are not edited because I do not want to alter what is coming to me through “Great Spirit”.  I am not seeking perfection, only serving as a vessel to bring love, peace, and joy, to our humanity 

Thank You Jim Brickman for your beautiful music that vibrates through this recording. This is a selection from his album – “Music to Quiet Your Mind and Sooth Your World”.

Stay in Touch:     http://heart4kidsadvocacy.org/

***For translation: touch the Blue globe on the top right hand corner of the blog.

 

 

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#5 -A Thought 4 Tuesday To Carry You Through This Beautiful Day! Integrity and Ethics vs Comfort and Convenience?

#5 -A Thought 4 Tuesday To Carry You Through This Beautiful Day! Integrity and Ethics vs Comfort and Convenience?

 Each Day In Your Life is Unique!

Tuesday is a day where we are being called to choose integrity and ethics over what is comfortable and convenient.  This is a phenomenon that is plaguing every aspect of our humanity.  It feels so raw and out of reach to expect that people will operate in their affairs coming from a place of integrity or be ethical in what they do.  Mommie always said that “The reflection of who a society is starts at the top and tringles down”.  As I look at where we are as a humanity right now, Mommie was absolutely right.  There is a problem with that though, because we need to reconnect with the values and morals that will sustain the essence of who we were designed to be authentically. 

If we are to evolve in our consciousness and being in integrity and ethical is how we must operate naturally.  If however we are concerned about the external world over our internal world, we are shortchanging ourselves and perhaps on a larger scale we are not gifting humanity what we have come to share.  I believe that one of the reasons we are experiencing the world as it is today in chaos and destruction, is that we were too comfortable and chose convenience over rising to do what we know needed to be done or said. 

Tuesday is reminding us that we owe ourselves and others to be wholly who we are and to stand on the elements of our character that speak to why we are here, what we have come to share, and how we recognize and honor our vibrational connection as human beings.  There is so much freedom, peace, and joy in being in integrity in your life and being ethical in your words and deeds.  Freedom, I tell you!  It’s Freedom!

On a foot note-  I have a knowing that what you put out you get back in return! 

 So, breathe deeply! Close your eyes and visualize something that brings you back into homeostasis with your soul expression.  May today bring you a sense of peace, joy, and moments of feeling loved and validated for who you are and what you are gifting humanity.

Ashé! Have a Blessed Day and be a Blessing in someone else’s life!

 Thank You Jim Brickman for your beautiful music that vibrates through this recording. This is a selection from his album – “Music to Quiet Your Mind and Sooth Your World”.

Stay in Touch:     http://heart4kidsadvocacy.org/

 

 

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#5 -A Thought 4 Monday To Carry You Through This Beautiful Day!- Gentle Beginnings-

#5 -A Thought 4 Monday To Carry You Through This Beautiful Day!  Gentle Beginnings!

Each Day In Your Life is Unique!

Monday slides in slowly and is gently hidden! It is seemingly overshadowed by the amazing illumination of the light that Sunday carries in restoring us and grounding us in our purpose.  Sunday looks outward with clarity and Monday listens inward and deals with our emotions, intuitions, nurturing, and reflection.

Monday has layers that are waiting to be opened. It is the day which tends to the invisible because what is unseen will shape everything that follows.  Monday can be seen as the emotional gatekeeper of our entire week.  Monday carries the depth that makes the whole week sustainable for us.  I see Monday as our day to check in with our inner world.  How do I feel?  What do I need?  What do I need to do?

Monday is about creating emotional stability in our life and establishing a gentle rhythm to move through our day.  It is about being intentional in setting the tone that calms our soul and our reactions to life, so that we are not agitated and frazzled. Remember that Monday holds for us the opportunities to –

Pause before reacting! Feel before speaking! And to Listen beneath the noise that is trying to distract us from our peace and grounding. 

Monday is not meant to be intense it is meant to be intentional and that is a skill that colors the quality of our life.

So, breathe deeply! Close your eyes and visualize something that brings you back into homeostasis with your soul expression and the attunement that Monday gracefully provides for you.  May today bring you a sense of peace, joy, and moments of feeling loved and validated for who you are and what you are gifting humanity.

Ashé! Have a Blessed Day!

Thank You Jim Brickman for your beautiful music that vibrates through this recording. This is a selection from his album – “Music to Quiet Your Mind and Sooth Your World”.

Stay in Touch:     http://heart4kidsadvocacy.org/

 

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Tiny Tips 4 Moms and Dads #5-Why I am Your Parent and not Your Friend!

Tiny Tips for Moms and Dads-#5

Why I am Your Parent and not Your Friend!

We Home School our Grandchildren and this provides us with the opportunity to engage in their learning experiences and to build a relationship that allows us to witness and support their development.

Rachel Carson once said

“If a child is to keep alive his inborn sense of wonder, he needs the companionship of at least one adult who can share it, rediscovering with him the joy, excitement and mystery of the world we live in.”

I believe that this is a topic that All parents have to deal with.  We have to really have clarity on what it is and what it means to be a “parent”.  We all have a need to be loved and appreciated by our children.  We want them to like the person we are, and we want to have a special and sacred place in their life.  I would be lying if I said otherwise.  But the truth is that we cannot occupy both roles simultaneously!  We have our own role as parent, and we want our children to have healthy relationships with others throughout their life that can fill the role as their “Friend”. We have a different level of commitment and responsibility than friends do.

We have the opportunity to show our children the beauty and treasure of what friendship can be in their lives.  I believe in conversation, when we are clear about what it is to be a parent, children will be able to understand the difference between what it means to be a parent and what it is to be a friend. Even though each of these relationships carry with them a huge responsibility of trust and commitment, the relationship of being a parent far outweighs that of being a friend.  Good friends are hard to find and even harder to keep.  What we experience throughout our lives is that at times we outgrow our friends and our life’s journey takes us in a different direction.

Children experience some of the same situations, and if they don’t have us to talk this through with them, sometimes it affects them negatively.  So many times, I hear adults reveal an incident that happened in their childhood with rejection from a friend that stunted their ability to trust other people. Many times, when children share these experiences, parents feel that if they ignore these little incidents, it will blow over.  Well, depending on the child’s self-esteem and parental support, some children may or may not bounce back and will take the, what might appear as rejection, personally.

Perhaps because you are not your child’s friend, you are the one true constant in their lives.  You don’t have to tell them what they want to hear or support them in things that might not be their best interest.  Your relationship must be raw with truth and honesty. It does not mean that you are not sensitive, loving, and caring.  It does not mean that you are not respectful of their feelings.  There is that old saying, “that blood (family) is thicker than water”.  This means that we have a connection that will not allow us to reject each other.  We can argue with each other.  We can dislike each other’s actions, but we are destined to love each other.  Love is creative and most of the time we construct our own way of loving someone.

This is not that type of love.  The love we have for our children is something that must be untouchable. It is something that we have a responsibility of safeguarding from society and anyone or thing that is a destructive force against that love. A time will come when you will have to redesign what that parent child relationship might look like, but the core of your relationship is a love that is instinctual.  I go into more depth on this topic in my book- Embracing the Gift of Parenthood.

P.S.- The funny thing is that children feel more secure knowing we are their parent and not their friend.

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