Heart4kidsadvocacyforum's Blog

There is so much talk about – “Self-Care”, which is not a bad thing, on the contrary, it has served as an awareness to something that we need to attend to- awake up call-a call to action, and this time it is an awakening that we must “Care for Ourselves”.  You see I feel that “Self -Care”, excludes others who participate in our life experience and with whom we interface with in a personal relationship, from taking any responsibility for ensuring that we are respected, appreciated, and taken care of.  “Caring for Ourselves” entails a collaboration of sorts that those love ones and friends that we support have an opportunity in kind to do the same for us.  It is simple!  It is the little things like acknowledging that you are taking out time to attend to your needs from simply taking out time to read a book, take a long soak in warm water, getting a massage, going for a walk on the beach, sipping a glass of wine, eating your favorite meal, dabbling in your favorite hobby, doing something for yourself that you enjoy but never seem to have the time or space to do, going on an outing to do something with someone whose company you enjoy and they enjoy doing what you like to do.

 I think that we don’t give people the benefit of the doubt so much of the time and we shortchange them from being able to rise to the occasion and show us how they are willing to support our well-being.  We assume that we are not important enough or even worse, that they don’t care about what our needs are.  If we don’t start out the way we want to end up or love ourselves enough to imagine that we are worthy of being cared for, we are selling ourselves short!  We deserve to be treated with the same love and attention that we adorn others with.  It is to be a reciprocal relationship built on respect, love, compassion, and devotion.   

All of these physical and tangible things are important but to be honest, it is necessary for us to start with caring for ourselves in terms of our spiritual well being first.   If we are out of alignment or overwhelmed nothing else will be able to sustain our equilibrium and give us a state of wellness if we have not first attended to the very foundation of our being.  So much is wrapped up in our soul expression that it is vital to keep a close check on how we are doing in taking out a moment to reflect and introspectively, commune with our spiritual identity.  We must ask ourselves if we are feeling that we are living and being our authentic selves in all aspects of our life expression.  We have to ask ourselves if we are feeding our souls the nourishment, they need to be healthy enough to support the fullness of our life.   I think it is important to formulate a daily regime wrapped in specific rituals that each person must design for themselves.  This practice needs to reflect the unique deeds that will comfort and support us in caring for ourselves.  Some things we should do daily and other things that are special and more complicated must be planned with great intention and preparation. 

My Ritual for “Caring for Myself” looks somewhat like this and I want to emphasize it will be different for each person.

First when I open my eyes from my nights slumber, the first thing I do is face the sunlight and say my prayer of gratitude. There is no way for me to start my day without connecting with “Great Spirit” and to let “Spirit” know how grateful and appreciative I am for caring me through the night and preparing my new day”, for me.  I am given validation in this process that I will be cared for and that all I my life will be in “Divine Right Order”.  I will throughout the day check in with “Great Spirit” to make sure I am on the right track and that I am living in the “Present” so as to be living in the midst of the “Presence”! 

Secondly, when in my process of preparing for my day, I take a moment out to look in the mirror so as to look into my eyes-the seat of my soul- and assess what is happening with me spiritually.  I can tell when looking into my eyes, exactly how I am feeling physically and spiritually.  I give myself a little talk and sure myself up if I am not feeling tip top and remind myself that I live in a sacred space of gratitude and that whatever might be trying to pull me out of my divine identity, I am in control and God is in charge.

Thirdly, while I am sitting down drinking my morning coffee, I write down the things I want to accomplish in the day.  I have an agreement with ‘Great Spirit”, that I only do what is reasonable and does not stress me out.   I know that I have my list and that God has a list and that in reality, I will only get done what “Great Spirit”, has ordained.  I have learned with life experiences that overloading my plate, does not serve me well, and that in caring for myself, I must be intentionally gentle and respectful with myself.  I make sure that if there are things that I need to do, that require support, that I have the necessary help I need.  I let my family and friends know if possible beforehand because I respect their time and energy as well.

Fourthly, it is important to exercise our mind, body, and spirit.  This entails that at some point in my busy day I have to have time to do something that will put my mind in a state of peace and joy.  I have to find a modality of physical exercise that resonates with me so that I will do it not only consistently, but actually enjoy the experience. Lastly, I have to periodically check in with my “Spirit”, to see if I am in alignment with my “Divine Identity”, and that I have not let anything or anyone  take me out of my sacred space.

Finally at night before going to sleep, I take a moment to reflect on my day and take and inventory of the things I had accomplished, what brought me joy, what made me feel loved and appreciated, and to reiterate to myself how grateful I am for the life I am having the privilege of living.

Each of has to design our own pattern of “Caring for Ourselves in respect to who we are and what we need in our life that will bring us balance, joy, fulfillment, and self-love.