Heart4kidsadvocacyforum's Blog

It is important for us as parents to acknowledge what does and does not resonant with our children.  Each one, no matter how many children are in the family, will express themselves and their likes and dislikes differently and of course they will not necessarily like the same things.  So take note! They seem to come with a certain essence about them that little by little is revealed in their interactions with their family, family environment, other relations, and friends.  They need to have the latitude and freedom to tell us what they like and dislike.  They need the safety net that will make them feel that we are willing to give them the space and respect to be their authentic self.  There is the saying, “pick your battles”, and this really applies to parenting.  If we create a relationship with our children that is crafted on battling with them about everything, we will never be able to engage them in a collaborative and sustainable parent-child healthy relationship.

There will be times that we as parents have to make a choice for them when it involves their safety and wellbeing.  Even then, however, it is important to talk to our children about “why”, we are making the choice we are making.  I feel that this supports children in being able to utilize their innate gift of discernment when making their own important and difficult decisions. There is so much modeling of behavior in the art of parenting.  Parenting it is a lot of work grounded in acute observational skills, patience, unconditional love, void of judgement, full of grace, and being gentle with ourselves, if we are to sustain this eternal relationship. Now I want to assure you that all of our engagement with our children is not just nurturing and guiding them!  There has to be a balance so that we also know how to be playful, and joy filled spirits around them! We don’t want to be heavy weighted energies around them, so that we stifle the joy, excitement, and exploration, of their sacred “childhood”! Actually, it is kind of funny to watch what they come up with in terms of their likes and dislikes. Remember, they are not “picky”, they just know what fits and resonates them.