Heart4kidsadvocacyforum's Blog

Discovering the need to love and respect oneself is a huge milestone development in human beings.  It requires a lot of nurturing and guidance so that the ego which fuels this “love affair with self” is in balance and is healthy. We are not trying to nurture narcissism so that our children end up having an unhealthy relationship with them selves and cannot engage in a healthy relationship with other people.  Children first learn their value, importance to the village, and what love and respect looks like and feels like, from their parents.  We have to realize that the way in which we relate to our children sets the stage for development in many areas of their life.

Loving and respecting oneself is the basic foundation for every other domain of our being.  It supports every aspect of our life’s experience.  If it is not in tack, it can negatively impact us when we need that sense of “divine identity” to support us when we face challenges in life.  It is important to find ways on a daily basis to validate our children, but it must be authentic!  Children know when we are being earnest and when we are not.  We model that gentility and tenderness that is distinctive to who we are as parents.  Because we love our children so deeply, it is effortless to show them love and respect and to expect other people to do the same.  Unfortunately, it does not work that way.  The world is not going to treat or care for our children the way we do nor the way their “village” does and so this is why it is vital that we are work diligently to guide, nurture and protect their self-love and self-esteem. 

I suggest that we create little affirmations that they can learn and become a daily ritual for them-possible for life!  As a parent to this day, I can feel when my daughter needs a little affirmation and I text her one of our special affirmations.  It is also a special connection between the two of us!  We all need each other’s support in grounding us through this ever-changing upside-down world. 

These are my little suggestions to get you started in creating your own:

1. I am love and I am loved.
2. I can safely share my feelings with my parents and my village.
3. I deserve to be happy, but it is ok to feel sad, mad, and afraid when I feel that way.
4. I am a beautiful person in my heart, my mind, and body.
5. I am perfect just the way I am because I am myself.
6. I am patient and kind with other people as I want others to be with me.
7. Sometimes people try to hurt my feelings, but I refuse to let their pain hurt me.  
8. I am smart, creative, and gifted.
9. I can do anything I put my mind to that brings me joy and a feeling of accomplishment.
10. I am compassionate and generous of spirit.
11. I am grateful and appreciative for all the beautiful things in my life.
12. I am empowered by my divine spirit to be the best version of my highest self -my authentic self.